Your personality isn't necessarily set in stone. With a little experimentation, people can reshape their temperaments and inject passion, optimism, joy and courage into their lives
你的个性并不一定像石头一样不可更改。通过一点点尝试,人们可以重塑自己的禀性并为生活注入激情、乐观、快乐和勇气
APsychologists have long held that a person's character cannot undergo a transformation in any meaningful way and that the key traits of personality are determined at a very young age. However, researchers have begun looking more closely at ways we can change. Positive psychologists have identified 24 qualities we admire, such as loyalty and kindness, and are studying them to find out why they come so naturally to some people. What they're discovering is that many of these qualities amount to habitual behavior that determines the way we respond to the world. The good news is that all this can be learned.
A 心理学家一直认为:一个人的个性不可能经受任何真正有意义的改造,而人性中那些重要的特点在非常年幼的时候便已定型。然而,研究人员已开始更加密切地审视那些我们可以改变的方法。积极的心理学家列出了24种我们所赞赏的品性,例如忠诚和善良,并在着手研究它们以探究为什么它们就这样自然而然地出现在了某些人身上。他们正在逐渐发现的是:这些品质中有许多实际上就是习惯性行为,它们决定了我们对这个世界作出反应的方式。好消息是:所有这些都可以通过后天学习而获得。
有一些品质发展起来并不像另外一些那么富有挑战性,其中之一就是乐观。然而,要发展这些品质需要我们掌握一系列多样且有时候令人惊叹的技能。例如,想要把更多的快乐和热情带入你的生活,你就必须保持开放的心态来经历负面情绪。开发这样的品质将会帮助你实现自己的最大潜力。
Some qualities are less challenging to develop than others, optimism being one of them. However, developing qualities requires mastering a range of skills which are diverse and sometimes surprising. For example, to bring more joy and passion into your life, you must be open to experiencing negative emotions. Cultivating such qualities will help you realise your full potential.
B “有很好的证明表明,大多数人格特征都是可以被改变的,”密歇根大学的心理教授Christopher Peterson这样说,他还引用了自己本人的例子。他天生内向,很早就意识到作为一个学者,自己的沉默寡言在演讲厅里将是灾难性的。于是他学会了表现得更加外向并使课堂变得欢乐。“现在我的外向举止是自发的,”他说道。
C David Fajgenbaum也不得不做出类似的转变。他正为考大学做准备,这时却遭遇了一场事故,这场事故终结了他的运动生涯。在大学校园里,他很快发现除了常规咨询外,他的学校没有没有为像他一样正在经历着身体复键并饱受抑郁之苦的学生提供服务。于是他发起组织了一个团队来帮助其他有着类似状况的人。尽管自身也在遭受痛苦,但他采取了行动——这是一个乐观主义者的典型反映。
B'The evidence is good that most personality traits can be altered,' says Christopher Peterson, professor of psychology at the University of Michigan, who cites himself as an example. Inherently introverted, he realized early on that as an academic, his reticence would prove disastrous in the lecture hall. So he learned to be more outgoing and to entertain his classes. 'Now my extroverted behavior is spontaneous,' he says.
D 肯塔基大学的心理学教授Suzanne Segerstrom相信提升乐观心态的关键在于通过培养乐观的行为而非正面的思维。她建议你训练自己去关注那些好事情,具体做法是每天写下当天发生的三件具有积极意义的事。这会有助于令你相信:好的结果其实时刻都会发生,这使得开始采取行动也会更容易。
E 你可以根据一个人对某种追求的大力度投入来判断这个人对此必定满怀热枕。Tanya Streeter的热情在于自由潜水——这种运动是在没有氧气罐和其他呼吸设备的情况下向深水处潜入。从1998年开始,她创造了九项世界纪录并能够屏息长达6分钟。这项运动对身体耐力的要求极高,但它对精神力量的要求甚至更能压倒一切。Streeter学会了通过判断自己的身体和精神能做到什么来排解她的恐惧感。“在我作为自由潜水者的比赛生涯里,确实存在着一个我能力所达的极限——但它远非我一开始所以为的那样而已,”她这样说。
CDavid Fajgenbaum had to make a similar transition. He was preparing for university, when he had an accident that put an end to his sports career. On campus, he quickly found that beyond ordinary counseling, the university had no services for students who were undergoing physical rehabilitation and suffering from depression like him. He therefore launched a support group to help others in similar situations. He took action despite his own pain – a typical response of an optimist.
F 找到一个你能为之感到兴奋的追求可以提升任何人的生活质量。不过,根据北卡罗纳大学的心理学Paul Silvia的看法,运用此种热情的秘诀则在于“它们都需要自我约束、全力以赴和力所能及,这也就是为什么它们会如此有回报感的原因。”心理学家Todd Kashdan为那些正在开启一项新的倾注热情对象的人们给出了这样的建议:“作为一个新来的,你还必须要容忍自己的无知并对此一笑置之。你必须愿意接受那些冲你扑面而来的负面感受,”他说道。
G 在2004年,医生兼科学家Mauro Zappaterra在哈佛医学院开始了他的博士生活。不幸的是,他倍感苦恼,因为他的研究与他对治疗方法的好奇并不兼容。他最终选择了暂时中断学业,并在Zappaterra的Santa Fe度过的八个月里学习了哈佛没有讲授的替代性医疗技术。当重返校园后,他更换了实验室以探索脑脊髓液是如何滋养了发育中的神经系统。他还下了决心要在每件事中寻找快乐,这其中也包括在失败中寻找,因为这样做能帮助他理解他的研究工作和他自身。
DSuzanne Segerstrom, professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky, believes that the key to increasing optimism is through cultivating optimistic behavior, rather than positive thinking. She recommends you train yourself to pay attention to good fortune by writing down three positive things that come about each day. This will help you convince yourself that favourable outcomes actually happen all the time, making it easier to begin taking action.
有一件事情会阻碍人们找到快乐,那就是他们过于关注“避免失败”而不是时刻期待着去做好一件事情。“只着眼于安全感可能会阻碍你达成自己的目标,”Kashdan这样解释道。例如,你是在希望平安撑过一场商务午宴而不让自己尴尬,还是在思考席间的对话有多么引人入胜?
H 通常,我们是以生理的角度来思考“勇气”这个概念的额,但是日常生活还需要另外一些东西。对于市场执行人员Kenneth Pedeleose来说,这意味着向某些从道德角度上在他看来是错误的东西大声说不。新上任的经理总是威吓员工,因此Pedeleose仔细记录下每次欺凌事件并最终将证据交给了一位职位更高的主管,同时也明白他自己的职位安全性将受威胁。最终走人的是哪位经理。根据Clemson大学的心理学家Cynthia Pury的看法,Pedeleose的故事证明了这样一点:勇气并非是由无所畏惧而是由道德责任感所激发的。Pury还相信人们都有能力获得勇气。她的许多学生都说,在面对某个存在风险的境况时,他们首先会尝试着让自己冷静下来,然后再去寻求降低危险的途径,正如Pedeleose通过记录他的指控证据所做到的那样。
EYou can recognize a person who is passionate about a pursuit by the way they are so strongly involved in it. Tanya Streeter's passion is freediving – the sport of plunging deep into the water without tanks or other breathing equipment. Beginning in 1998, she set nine world records and can hold her breath for six minutes. The physical stamina required for this sport is intense but the psychological demands are even more overwhelming. Streeter learned to untangle her fears from her judgment of what her body and mind could do. 'In my career as a competitive freediver, there was a limit to what I could do – but it wasn't anywhere near what I thought it was,' she says.
从长远来看,获得一个新的人格特点也许能帮助你朝向你想要成为的那个人迈进。而短期内看来,这种努力本身就能出乎意料地带来回报感,这是一场内心探险。
FFinding a pursuit that excites you can improve anyone's life. The secret about consuming passions, though, according to psychologist Paul Silvia of the University of North Carolina, is that 'they require discipline, hard work and ability, which is why they are so rewarding.' Psychologist Todd Kashdan has this advice for those people taking up a new passion: 'As a newcomer, you also have to tolerate and laugh at your own ignorance. You must be willing to accept the negative feeling that come your way,' he says.
GIn 2004, physician-scientist Mauro Zappaterra began his PhD research at Harvard Medical School. Unfortunately, he was miserable as his research wasn't compatible with his curiosity about healing. He finally took a break and during eight months in Santa Fe, Zappatera learned about alternative healing techniques not taught at Harvard. When he got back, he switched labs to study how cerebrospinal fluid nourishes the developing nervous system. He also vowed to look for the joy in everything, including failure, as this could help him learn about his research and himself.
One thing that can hold joy back is a person's concentration on avoiding failure rather than their looking forward to doing something well. 'Focusing on being safe might get in the way of your reaching your goals,' explains Kashdan. For example, are you hoping to get through a business lunch without embarrassing yourself, or are you thinking about how fascinating the conversation might be?
HUsually, we think of courage in physical terms but ordinary life demands something else. For marketing executive Kenneth Pedeleose, it meant speaking out against something he thought was ethically wrong. The new manager was intimidating staff so Pedeleose carefully recorded each instance of bullying and eventually took the evidence to a senior director, knowing his own job security would be threatened. Eventually the manager was the one to go. According to Cynthia Pury, a psychologist at Clemson University, Pedeleose's story proves the point that courage is not motivated by fearlessness, but by moral obligation. Pury also believes that people can acquire courage. Many of her students said that faced with a risky situation, they first tried to calm themselves down, then looked for a way to mitigate the danger, just as Pedeleose did by documenting his allegations.
Over the long term, picking up a new character trait may help you move toward being a person you want to be. And in the short term, the effort itself could be surprisingly rewarding, a kind of internal adventure.
Look at the following statements (Questions 19-22) and the list of people below.
Match each statement with the correct person, A-G.
Write the correct letter, A-G, in boxes 19-22 on your answer sheet.